Why you shouldn’t always bother about people’s opinion about you

Its important to know this, the people who say you are a bad person aren’t perfect themselves and the accumulation of their opinion still doesn’t mean you are bad. They could just have issues the same way they say you have issues… As they claimed though.

Pleasing people is a tough work to do and I know we have all tried one time or the other to be called and referred to as “good boy or girl”, but as much as you have tried you have also realized it’s not working, so just stop to trying and learn this

  • Do not always give a ‘fuck’ about people’s comment on who you are

People will determine who you are based on the present thing(s) they see about you, they are not going to sum up your total behavioral pattern; find the average to determine who you are.

I remember my neighbor calling me names the day I refused to run errands for her, the same woman I have been doing the errand job for almost every day in 6 years, but because I refused that day she tagged me a bad boy coupled with the other elders she reported me to.

Last week while on my way to work I had a heated argument with a cab driver and he started calling me names, names that were offensive and do not define who I am. Well…this is me knowing that I am a good person, but at that moment anyone passing by could easily give his/her judgement that I am definitely a bad person as the annoying cab driver had claimed.

You should understand this phenomenon, people are social animals and what I mean by this is that we all follow trends and occurrences especially the ones we see to make our judgement and most of this judgement are just bad ones, based on situationships.

Listen to your conscience whenever people call you names either good or bad, do not be hyped by their hyping, rather assess yourself internally if you are really what they say you are, so that next time when someone call you a bad person, you can just wave it off knowing fully that its just the person’s opinion, but you are a really good good person.

  • Don’t take it to heart when they say “You will still need my help”

I have heard this statement thousands of time in my life and when people say this, I start to process it. Have I really cut out my help supply? Guy you’ve just lose out on a big opportunity !!! See finish it is over for you!!!. So my coward self just decide to make peace with the person in order to continue to get the help the fellow has been rendering.

Growing up I began to realize this is just simply an emotional blackmail strategy to always make me stay under them, another thing I realized is that those that say that to me are really not helping me, they are just using me and the statement was meant to stop my liberation from their bondage.

So I made a decision that whenever anyone says that to me I just ignore them and remind myself that as long as I have what to offer I will never be short of helpers, so if they stop to help me I will definitely meet someone else that is ready to do so.

There are billions of people on earth and approximately if you are not stagnant with your life you should probably meet millions in your life time who are ready and willing to help you,

Relying on the same helper for a long long time could be the sign of stagnancy, so don’t rely on a particular person to help you, spread your tentacles and continue to add value you wouldn’t be short of helpers, and ignore the sabotage of “You will need my help”.

  • Learn how to “Para” or “Change it for People”

My fellow sisters and brothers there are so many annoying people on the face of the earth and it has been confirmed that you will surely meet one or two per day.

In my year one in school I stayed in the school hostel and we were four in a room, we had this roommate who behaves anyhow , sometimes he even opened our pots in our absence and eats our meat, we endured this hardship for a semester but when I couldn’t take it anymore, one day I gave him the shock of his life, I stood up against him and told him to stop the rubbish he does and he stopped misbehaving afterwards, In fact people were like “we thought you are gentle oooo” I just told them “Welcome to the North side of me”.

If you don’t stand up against people sometimes they are going to take advantage of your gentility and make a big mess of you, It’s even normal for human being to ride weaker people, but when you tell them ‘No’ they will shelf their crazy behavior and leave your territory.

For me I don’t even let you know that I am gentle because I detest rubbish in my life. I just give it to you anyway you give it to me, even though I wouldn’t advise you to do this, But know today that it is not bad to lose your home training sometimes when it comes to dealing with annoying people , just be moderate about it, do not expect you will to hear good things about you from other people always, guard your heart against bad comment since you know that’ s not who you are, it’s just the person’s opinion(s), then do not be stagnant with your life, the duration of people in your life has an expiry date move on when the expiry date comes and you will be happy with your life.

Thank you for reading, Kindly follow me Ale Oluwaseyi S @oluwaseyiale on twitter and @Oluwaseyiale on IG.. Check my web Oluwaseyiale

Oluwaseyi is a project manager, Writer and Environmental Health enthusiast. I create programs that drives development and Growth, I write content for marketing.